Wherein I Discover The True Reason For Video iPods

I never saw the point of attempting to watch a movie on 2x2" screen; granted I'm a huge film buff, but first of all I can't imagine staring at a screen that small for 90+ minutes, and if you're watching anything with any kind of visual appeal how could you possibly receive the scope of the intent behind the images at that kind of downscale? And as television drama gets better and better, the less I want to watch a micronauts version of that media as well. So what's left besides the odd music video? Does anyone even watch music videos anymore?

Then yesterday I stumbled across something that's far from new, but is the exact kind of bite-size pleasurable nugget which was conceived for easy consumption over 50 years ago and plugs smoothly into this new format.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Tom & Jerry.



Or course, you could argue that any short-form cartoon fits the bill, but consider this: With T & J you don't have to worry about the volume or clarity of the audio (I mean, have you ever tried to listen to music on an airplane? You have to turn the fucking thing all the way up to even hear anything over the background noise); there's normally just some orchestral music (or jazzy, space-aged vibes during the later, Chuck Jones period) and sound effects, and rarely any dialogue (save for when the black maid yells at Tom in a cringe-worthy dialect that is so outdated and un-P.C. you're better off not being able to hear it).

The other thing is that there's never much of a plot that you have to worry about paying too much attention to. The cat is trying to catch the mouse, and in the process they beat the hell out of each other with various household (or backyard) items, the cat usually suffering the most. It's that simple. And it NEVER gets old. You'd think the 50th time you saw an ironing board fall down onto Tom's head, either flattening it into a pancake or leaving one of those lava-lamp-upward-drip-sized bumps, it would cease to be funny. But it still is.

So you dump the entire collection of 3-5 minute shorts into your iPod's video library, hit shuffle, and treat yourself to a random assortment of cartoon sado-masochism. It's a great way to pass little waves of time, and as you're shutting yourself out from the rest of the world in a digital bubble amidst the din of public transporation or the city streets, it's a great reminder to stay on your toes, because everyone's out to get you, and there might be a frying pan around the corner with
your name on it.





And speaking of T & J, here's a news story that's over a year old but I can't get over how fucked up these guys are. Maybe we do need to start another war:

[Religious fanatics make me cry.]